here i am, take me apart

take me apart.


i keep getting this feeling like i'm lost. like love is lost. love is gone.
away with the sun. far across the sky a star runs away and dies but i am nothing anymore.

dead butterflies.
i saw many yesterday.
i went to a little nature center that had them in little glass cases.
some of them were so shiny and colorful and magnificent.
just felt like mentioning that.

today was boring.
i did nothing of significance.

tomorrow i go to a vow renewal ceremony. woo.
see people i'm technically related to who i've either never met or only saw when i was so young i don't remember them now.
pretty much.

it's going to depress me.
the thought of a 60th wedding anniversary depresses me.
yes.
because i only ended up thinking of the absence of that kind of love in my life.
and it depresses me.
i'm getting depressed now by thinking about it.

so moving on...
well, i am thankful for music. music is love.
i am thankful that i sing. yes.
that is all.

all my love,
Heather