skies are blue

i passed!

my test i mean.

i did pretty well on my keyboarding test also.

so everything is set for me to go to school.
they told me i won't get an official acceptance letter until May, but that since i passed the test i'll definitely be getting one.
all that's left to set up is my financial aid, but that's it.
i'm so excited!


i'm also feeling very good about something else. i'm getting a chance to patch my relationship with two different people who really mean a lot to me. it amazes me what life sometimes brings to us. i'm am so grateful to have the opportunity to make up with people.
what's better is this: i explained to these friends what was going on with me in the time i made the bad choices that led to troubles we had, and doing that really helped them understand things better. i'm really glad i could successfully express myself, and that the response was positive.

it's absolutely wonderful, the evidence that i'm changing for the better.
to see that i can make things work. to see that the past is the past, and i can leave those things behind me.
to know i can be happy.
to know i can love.

i am happy.
life is beautiful.
change is the constant.

knowing i can make my life my own finally gives me a sense of freedom.
things fit into place because i put them together, like a puzzle.

there are still some things i don't like, bit can deal.

life feels balanced. balance is good.
i feel much closer to being whole again.
even though i don't have any friends here. even though i don't really gets to spend time with people my own age.

i really miss fun with friends, but i no longer feel like i'm dying without it.
i finally feel like my own person again.

learning, learning, learning. always learning.

it's also day 5 of not biting my nails. progress. yay!

and i want to start something new today for these blogs. for each blog, i will make sure to post something i am thankful for. i used to do it in my journal. so i'll actually do at least two things: one internal, one external.

today:
i am thankful for forgiveness. for the ability of others to forgive.
i am thankful for my ability to grow. to reach new heights.

i also want to say that i am thankful for change. change for the better.

and i will survive.

all my love,
Heather