Saturday, May 1, 2010

so fix your eyes and get up

when you go would you have the guts to say,
"i don't love you, like i did yesterday."

song of the moment: i don't love you by my chemical romance

this song is just wonderful. and i just found it today.
also: welcome to the black parade & famous last words
are good, too.

my chemical romance = love <3

i'm moving back into a dark phase. not to be confused with the negative.
i've always had my fascination with the darker elements of life. i am a little morbid, in all honesty. i like it. i like goth things. i like vampires. i like blood and gore. i like black. i like lost nights and broken stars.
it's just part of who i am.

and my hair happens to be black accident.
i was going for dark brown, but i think my hair must've been a little too light or something so now it's black. ah well. it least it doesn't look bad.
i'm a teeny bit frustrated because some of the red is showing through still, in streaks, but even that i can deal with.

i am making progress with illustrations. all but one have been started. some of them only need coloring now. i hope to get most of them completely drawn tomorrow so i can move on to coloring and have them done on wednesday or thursday.

meanwhile, i'm brainstorming to write some song lyrics. my father said if i wrote some lyrics he'd help me get music together for them.
and then, some time in the future, i'll be recording another song! very exciting for me.
so i want to be really happy with the lyrics. hence, i am brainstorming what i want in the contents of the lyrics. yes. get it all together. make it flow. make it amazing, somehow, but not really. but still nice.

at this point, nonono, i am not going to to try getting a job. with my trip and school coming up, i am going to wait now. i've tried at even the places i thought for sure i could find something, like mcd's, but no such luck. yes, that's how freaking bad the job market is right now.
my plan is to resume my job search if i determine that i can handle a job and school at the same time. that means i'll have to find somewhere i can only work weekends and nights, but we'll see. it all depends if i think i can handle it.
school is my number one priority, as soon as it begins. i can't afford to let anything get in the way this time. i have to to put a lot of my time and focus into it. so maybe a job, maybe not.

but school for sure.

i am thankful, oh so much, for music, as usual. music is love. is beauty. is life.
it lifts me up.
it eases the pain of breaking apart.
it makes me feel good.
i am thankful for what little musical ability i have because that just adds so much to it.

with all my heart,

^o^we'll carry on, we'll carry on...

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