Friday, February 26, 2010

dreaming the lives of the mad

i was on the run. it was summer time wherever i was and i walked along a path of pebbles. i came to a place where i met up with a woman selling jewelry. i crouched down and sorted through pieces, finding ones i wanted and shoving them hastily into a small black backpack. the woman hovered above me, but did not bother me.

something went wrong. i walked over to the side and my body failed me, and as i crouched down again my body crumpled into a heap and suddenly the madness overcame me. i felt sinister and bloodthirsty as i started to stand up, intending to go after the woman. but moments after i stood up, i became dizzy and toppled over, momentarily passing out.
when i came to, the woman was gone, as well as others who had been in the area.

then i woke up.

i'm so curious about this dream.
i mean, it could just be the books i've been reading, since i've been making my way through the Cirque du Freak series, which is about vampires.

or it could be, that feeling, the madness of my soul.
i feel it there.
something waiting, something growing, something surrounded by darkness.
something filled with rage and terror. something hungry.
with a bitter heart.

another side of me maybe. it's hard to say. i'm losing track of them.

but the feeling is kind of exciting, right? i was feeling liked i'd lost my mind, i was feeling like nothing made sense, i was feeling like...going on a killing spree.
i wonder if this makes me crazy, for even enjoying that kind of emotion.
but i tend to like exploring the vast range of emotions, feelings, tastes, that are possible.

i admit that i relished the idea, and feeling that way. it was wonderful. it was magnificent. in a strange, outlandish, mysterious sort of way.

oh, to explore the minds of the mad. lovely.

all my love,

No comments:

Post a Comment