Sunday, November 14, 2010

just another week

So this past week threatened to be disastrous. But I am still here. I am alive. I survived.

Sunday-I felt awful. Sick. Exhausted. Knew I needed to study. Hoped I would have a better time with my tests in the coming week (since the Friday before I took a test while I was manic and silently freaking out and couldn't think straight or manage to remember a whole bunch of things I had learned.)Felt irritated a bit by my father that night.

Monday-Felt a bit better. Tried to relax. Couldn't seem to relax. Tried to study. Couldn't focus. Did some puzzles in attempt to take my mind of all the crap. Hoped at least that would feel better for for Tuesday.

Tuesday-Woke up after having a really freaky nightmare. Felt a bit less sick but got up late. Had to rush around, no time to shower, almost late to class. Stressed out about needing better grades in two of my classes.

Wednesday-Horror. Woke up around 4:30 in the morning. Something hard underneath me. Discovered it was my glasses. Pulled them out and decided part was missing, still under me. Thinking Oh crap, not this again. Turned on light to try and see what had happened to them. So disoriented I gave up and tried to sleep more.
Got up later and figured out the the glasses could not be easily fixed, if at all. Got my father to tape them together for me since I couldn't see to do it myself.
More horror. Classes went fine until A&P at 12. Girl (who has often been disruptive and rude in class before) gets up in front of entire class and says she has something to say. Thinking oh god, now what? but did not expect what was coming. In front of the entire class, she accuses me and a friend of mine in the class of discussing other people's grades and talking shit about them behind their backs, of speaking up too much in class and not giving anyone else a chance to answer, and basically being kind of stuck-up and thinking we're better than her, are grades are better, ha ha. Goes on to make statements about saying things to her face (though i later learn she talks about me behind my back) and a comment that basically translated into the "My life is so much harder than yours though. That's why my grades aren't as good as yours." excuse. Which we all know is bullshit, or some of us anyway (all i can say is that me and my friend have all kinds of issues going on and it was ignorant for her to assume we have it easy).
Basically, the whole things was a lie. All of it. Not one bit was true. Me and my friend only discuss each other's work and grades, not others. We don't even know other's grades most of the time anyway. I rarely speak up in that class or raise my hand to answer questions, so I was confused where she had gotten that idea from. And I certainly don't go around bragging about being better than people because i get better grades (I found out later that somebody supposedly saw on my facebook a bunch of stuff where I was bragging all the time and saying i was better than people and similar things. (Not only is this not true, but only three people at that school even have access to my facebook, none of whom were the same people making such accusations).
This incident led to my facebook status about being better than people because I'm more mature, not because I'm smarter (and i hope most of you who saw that realized I was being sarcastic and making my own little joke to lighten the stress on me from that day.) I NEVER boast about being better than people ever. Except in situations where I was clearly joking among close friends who knew very well I didn't really mean it.

Thursday-Resolve to just ignore/not talk to anyone who chimed in with their own accusations from the previous day. (This included the one girl who has every class with me, but oh well. She'll have to find help with homework elsewhere now. I don't tolerate being disrespected by people if i don't have to.)
Discussed the issue of the day before to the teacher whose class it had occurred in, so hopefully it won't happen again. Breathed a sigh of relief when no further accusations were made.
Had a hypoglycemic episode but managed to get some free food from the luncheon that day before I passed out. Still felt like crap afterward.
Went home with an awful headache. Irritated because my taped up glasses now sat slanted on my face and messed with my vision.
Came home. Found out about over half of my coffee was now gone because of guy that rents room in our house (and it was one of those big Folger tubs, too). Frustrated because coffee is not exactly cheap but I mainly rely on it to settle my stomach since I wake up feeling nauseous almost every morning.

Friday-Exhausted from the week. Stressed. Annoyed even more by my broken glasses. Spent almost entire duration of my last class of the day not wearing glasses because my eyes were so irritated from them being slanted and screwing with my vision.
Some people asked me if I was okay because apparently I looked sick, but my only issue was with the glasses.

Saturday-Tried to de-stress. Had a very pleasant conversation with a friend of mine that lifted my spirits. Felt pretty good about the day.
Then on my way up the stairs, full glass of milk in hand, i slipped and fell, bruising my leg in three places to the point where it hurt like hell. Somehow managed to only spill a little bit of my milk, but pulled the railing for the stairs loose.

And now it's a new week. My leg is still sore. I actually, on a whim, went to church this morning and it went okay. I even ended up singing with the choir since I was familiar with today's anthem.

I got through the week though. My glasses are still broken (not like I have any money to get new glasses) so yeah. Bleh.

When life gives you crap, the best thing you can do is hope it comes out the right end. (hahaha. get it?)

All my love to all y'alls who read this (and don't think i'm a total loser. if you do, gtfo. seriously. though i mean this in the nicest way possible. not really.


PS. To those of you who don't know, gelatin is made from animals. Seriously. From collagen in their skin and bones.

PPS. If I just ruined Jell-O and all other gelatin-containing foods for you (like gummy bears, other assorted gummy candies, and chewing gum and oh yeah, marshmallows) then, NO, I am not sorry for telling you the truth. (okay...maybe I'm a little sorry, but I'll get over it).

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